Friday, June 30, 2006
don't give me hugs, give me blog hits
You might have noticed a few minor changes to my blog format.
By "minor" I mean I have plastered every spare inch of bare space with ads and links and buttons. Yes, I have whored my blog out in every way I could find, in a feeble attempt to increase my "traffic". Do 6-7 readers count as "traffic"? I believe the hip kids are using the word traffic to mean "patronage of one's website". In that context, I think half a dozen visitors qualifies more as "charity". I need validation! My life is so empty!!
ahem.
In doing some research on how to increase the visibility of your website, I ran into a common idea: Your blog needs to have a theme. A purpose. A Thing That Makes Your Blog Worthwile. They gave examples like blogs on current political events, sports, philosphy and the hilarious hijinks of celebrity skanks.
So.
Anyway.
Instead of determining what the point of my blog writing is, I found myself questioning why I should have a point at all?
(As you may have noticed) I make a lot of references to humor, being funny, wanting to make people laugh, the homeless, etc. That is because....it's all I've got to offer. This blog is not informative. It isn't cutting edge. It doesn't make social commentary, or have profound observations on the state of humanity. It doesn't tackle controversial current events. It's barely grounded in real, actual fact. I don't post about my interesting life as a Peace Corp doctor or a nude traveling minstrel. My blog has no line of coherence; there is no main topic or event that glues all my random posts together. People don't read my blog to get educated or inspired. I think "mild acknowledgement" best sums up how one feels after reading my posts.
I really bring nothing of any value or demand to the blogsphere. I think this website is the equivalent to pouring a shotglass of water into a lake. It's a silly and pointless thing to do. But it's moderately funny if you are in the right mood!! That's me, baby!! Somewhat humorous under the right conditions in certain situations :)
I just like to write silly, pointless stuff. Why bother inserting "life lessons" or "substance" into any of my blog? That's what the self-help section at Barnes and Noble is for!! I write with the feeble hope that a few people will come across my blog and laugh. I say I am writing for others, but really I write for myself. I want people to think I'm funny...because...I think I'm funny.
It's embarrassing to even write that sentence. That's like saying you are an artist and then showing off the velvet marker posters of unicorns you have colored. Because stuff like "being funny" is so subjective!! Once you throw that statement out into the universe, you have to back it up! There is no standardized test with an essay section to license yourself as A Funny Person.
(Note to self: Create test for funny license. Include topics such as schtick, slapstick, satire and Adam Sandler movies).
But anyway, the reason for this entire post (another thing my blog lacks... a point) is that I started out today trying to get more people to visit my blog. And in doing that, I thought, why care about having people read your posts if you have nothing to worthwhile write about? That is the strange thing about having a personal blog. You want people to read how interesting you are so that you can confirm for yourself that you are as interesting as you want to be. Phew! How silly. Personal blogs are asinine.
But.
Lucky for me and you, being silly and asinine is the purpose of this blog!! Yay! I found a purpose. We've come full circle!! Thanks for bearing through that soul-searching rant. And don't forget to tell your friends about my blog!!!
By "minor" I mean I have plastered every spare inch of bare space with ads and links and buttons. Yes, I have whored my blog out in every way I could find, in a feeble attempt to increase my "traffic". Do 6-7 readers count as "traffic"? I believe the hip kids are using the word traffic to mean "patronage of one's website". In that context, I think half a dozen visitors qualifies more as "charity". I need validation! My life is so empty!!
ahem.
In doing some research on how to increase the visibility of your website, I ran into a common idea: Your blog needs to have a theme. A purpose. A Thing That Makes Your Blog Worthwile. They gave examples like blogs on current political events, sports, philosphy and the hilarious hijinks of celebrity skanks.
So.
Anyway.
Instead of determining what the point of my blog writing is, I found myself questioning why I should have a point at all?
(As you may have noticed) I make a lot of references to humor, being funny, wanting to make people laugh, the homeless, etc. That is because....it's all I've got to offer. This blog is not informative. It isn't cutting edge. It doesn't make social commentary, or have profound observations on the state of humanity. It doesn't tackle controversial current events. It's barely grounded in real, actual fact. I don't post about my interesting life as a Peace Corp doctor or a nude traveling minstrel. My blog has no line of coherence; there is no main topic or event that glues all my random posts together. People don't read my blog to get educated or inspired. I think "mild acknowledgement" best sums up how one feels after reading my posts.
I really bring nothing of any value or demand to the blogsphere. I think this website is the equivalent to pouring a shotglass of water into a lake. It's a silly and pointless thing to do. But it's moderately funny if you are in the right mood!! That's me, baby!! Somewhat humorous under the right conditions in certain situations :)
I just like to write silly, pointless stuff. Why bother inserting "life lessons" or "substance" into any of my blog? That's what the self-help section at Barnes and Noble is for!! I write with the feeble hope that a few people will come across my blog and laugh. I say I am writing for others, but really I write for myself. I want people to think I'm funny...because...I think I'm funny.
It's embarrassing to even write that sentence. That's like saying you are an artist and then showing off the velvet marker posters of unicorns you have colored. Because stuff like "being funny" is so subjective!! Once you throw that statement out into the universe, you have to back it up! There is no standardized test with an essay section to license yourself as A Funny Person.
(Note to self: Create test for funny license. Include topics such as schtick, slapstick, satire and Adam Sandler movies).
But anyway, the reason for this entire post (another thing my blog lacks... a point) is that I started out today trying to get more people to visit my blog. And in doing that, I thought, why care about having people read your posts if you have nothing to worthwhile write about? That is the strange thing about having a personal blog. You want people to read how interesting you are so that you can confirm for yourself that you are as interesting as you want to be. Phew! How silly. Personal blogs are asinine.
But.
Lucky for me and you, being silly and asinine is the purpose of this blog!! Yay! I found a purpose. We've come full circle!! Thanks for bearing through that soul-searching rant. And don't forget to tell your friends about my blog!!!
Comments:
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Google Ads will tell you what your blog is about. Google advertised ferrets on my friends site for years. And oddly enough, his site was about ferrets.
But we all knew you were an attention whore, but now you seem to be wanting money in exchange for recieving attention... Hrmm, stay away from my children.
--serious--
A good way to increase traffic, is to go on other peoples blogs and comment the jeepers out of them. Post on message boards about stuff too. Everytime you do that you leave a link to your site. And then people who are much more likely to enjoy what you have to say visit your site and become addicted. Comments are the lifeblood of random blogs like yours and mine. Be part of the group.
A not so good way is to link to everything, you can do major sites but more importantly find other blogs and sites where people still pay attention to their stats. That way they see that you've included a link to them in a post of yours and then they come to check you out.
Be mindful of the difference between hits and attention. Adding ads and things may increase hits, but it doesn't do any good if people don't stay to read. You want readers. Pull them in slow, they'll start adding up.
Also, posting frequently would help. Its tough to not post for three months and then your seventh post back you start trying to draw hits your way. They'll come. People will notice.
/--serious--
But we all knew you were an attention whore, but now you seem to be wanting money in exchange for recieving attention... Hrmm, stay away from my children.
--serious--
A good way to increase traffic, is to go on other peoples blogs and comment the jeepers out of them. Post on message boards about stuff too. Everytime you do that you leave a link to your site. And then people who are much more likely to enjoy what you have to say visit your site and become addicted. Comments are the lifeblood of random blogs like yours and mine. Be part of the group.
A not so good way is to link to everything, you can do major sites but more importantly find other blogs and sites where people still pay attention to their stats. That way they see that you've included a link to them in a post of yours and then they come to check you out.
Be mindful of the difference between hits and attention. Adding ads and things may increase hits, but it doesn't do any good if people don't stay to read. You want readers. Pull them in slow, they'll start adding up.
Also, posting frequently would help. Its tough to not post for three months and then your seventh post back you start trying to draw hits your way. They'll come. People will notice.
/--serious--
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cheap car insurance for young driver
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Random Keyword: :)
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